The Poison Chalice 

Updated: Mar 17



One of the original sins, envy is a terrible harm to one's psyche.

It erodes and corrodes one's sense of self. It evicts us from the light and condemns us to a dark, lethargic state of 'not enough'. Its cruelty is more so because we inflict it on ourselves and the only correction of this harm is a choice and a course of action we choose for ourselves.

Destructive as it is, the real challenge with envy is that it is such an automatic response. More so, envy is such a tabooed emotion that we not only endure the self-esteem sapping consequences of envy, we then also judge ourselves for the very fact that we are feeling the envy in the first place. That is quite the double whammy!

And so, we suppress it. Or we think we do. We play tricks on our minds with our minds. Either we succumb to the envy and diminish ourselves; or we try to conquer it by diminishing the person/s that provoked our envy in the first place.

When you throw Perfectionism in the mix, you have a completely soul-destroying state that creeps up on you and saps your energy. You are catatonic. You are practically powerless to resist the notion that the other person's happiness, beauty, success or triumph means that you are no longer eligible for that beauty, happiness, success, triumph, etc. Except, that's not true. It's a fiction conjured so mysteriously, so quickly, so consistently that it feels true.

But it's not.

I repeat: 'It is not true!'

Your envy is an emotion; its a powerful emotion that is there to awaken you. It's there to reveal something to you. It shows you something that might matter to you. It shows you that there is a place for growth. It shows you that somewhere inside of you there is a distortion between who you are and what you have and do. It shows you where you may have to release things and let them go. It shows you where you may have to learn acceptance.

Envy shows you where you are hemorrhaging your power and where you might find your footing to come to fully stand in your power.

It shows you that it's time to love yourself more and that it's time to hold yourself in greater compassion.

It shows you that it's time to count your blessings more actively.


How do you respond to your envy? I really would love to know. I really would love to learn how to respond to envy better and to escape its clutches.


How do you recognize your own blessings in the face of envy?

Sometimes this is so hard to do. But I know that it is one of the most powerful ways to counteract the destructive force that is envy.


It erodes and corrodes one's sense of self. It evicts us from the light and condemns us to a dark, lethargic state of 'not enough'. Its cruelty is more so because we inflict it on ourselves and the only correction of this harm is a choice and a course of action we choose for ourselves.

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Fairland, Johannesburg

South Africa

Tel: +27 83 258 1251  makeshifthappen@newhabits.co.za

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